Sunday, August 26, 2012

Road Trip Day 5: our fiasco in the woods

Instead of spending the night at Smith Rock after a long day of climbing, we decided to pop on over to the Oregon coast, since Russ had never been there.

We found a free campground in Coos Bay on our GPS and decided to make the four hour drive and set up camp around 11 or 12 that night.


I'm a little infamous for falling asleep on road trips when I'm supposed to be navigating (just ask Russ about our first trip to Leavenworth when we were 17...he'll gladly tell ya all about it) so, to prevent myself from falling asleep, I bought a Dr. Pepper.

This just happened to be the night that I found out that after I drink caffeine to keep myself awake, and after it fails and sleep starts to win the battle...I start getting really, really paranoid. 

Good thing I never did drugs. I'd be carazay. 

We find the dirt road turn off for the campground around 11:30 and head on into the woods. The road is extremely narrow, the sky has clouded over with fog from the bay nearby and the moss covered trees are starting to make me feel more than a tad claustrophobic, when the thought hits me.


What if big foot, friggin BIG.FOOT. comes and gets us?
I'm freakin out kids.

Full on, approaching panic attack, freaking out.


We'd been driving down the dirt road further and further into these spooky woods when we realize, we've already driven 40 miles, we have to turn around or the campground has to show up soon. We come to a fork in the road with one fork blocked off by a fence, so we take the road to the left only to find the road to have been plowed into a big open space with all the shoveled around dirt piled in front of the continuing road.

At this point, we admit defeat and begin backtracking to a spot where our GPS would work again. Russell keeps insisting that I can fall asleep,that he is fine, but I insist on staying awake blabbering like a skitzo fool.

When, all of a sudden, I feel something huge crawling up my leg.

"Okay" I tell myself. "You've been being paranoid, it's probably just a string or something".
So, I bravely and calmly move my hand towards the thing crawling on me, pretty convinced at this point that there is just some inanimate object on my leg.


"There's a bug"
"Did you get it?"
"No, Russell...there's a bug"

Fully registering that there is a half-dollar sized creature scurrying its way up my flesh, I scream

and I smacked that bug right off of my leg. Russ slams on the breaks, turns on the cab light and hops out of the car while I scamper into the driver's seat just as the gargantuan beast attempts to crawl up and under the glove box compartment. 

Luckily for me, and unluckily for the giant stink-bug-beetle-satan-spawn, Russ is quick and pulled out his pocket knife, flipped out the pliers, grabbed its leg and flung it off into the woods to be eaten by Sasquatch.

When we finally got out of the woods and back onto a paved road, we headed straight to our newly-favorited-trusty camping spot...another Wal-Mart parking lot.

Luckily, the beach was gorgeous the next day and there were no more bugs in the car:

On to the Redwoods and the most Redneck experience of our trip...

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