October. 28, 2014
We had been waiting for this day for months, and somehow we knew we'd be getting a call today. We just knew it would work out like that...because life can get pretty crazy at times, and that seems to be the norm around here.
So around 8:30 on this beautiful Tuesday morning, I heard my phone start to ring and immediately realized it was our case worker calling. (We have a special tone set for her calls). Before answering my phone, I woke Russ up.
"Russell...Roxie is calling..."
"We knew it would happen like this..we knew it! Hello?"
Roxie continued to tell us that our home study was being worked on to change our license from adoption to foster care. We had decided that we were going to change our license at the beginning of the year and she was calling to tell us that,
"BUT" she said "I have a call for a little boy."
She proceeded to tell us what she knew about J. and I knew it was him. Russell was still half awake, although startled, so I asked her if I could have some time to relay the info to Russ and I'd text her back. We texted her within 5 minutes:
"Russ says 'well, that sounds pretty awesome'
We'd love to get more info"
I remember sitting on the couch reading over the additional information, knowing and just thinking to myself...no way...we found him...
As soon as Russell walked through the door, I told him all about J. and he shook his head slightly and said something along the lines of
"holy crap, this is totally him"
The meeting was all set to take place at 9:00 Wednesday morning, so I emailed our case worker around 8 saying "fingers crossed for today!"
at 9:00 she emailed back
"actually, meeting is rescheduled for tomorrow"
"ok, well, fingers crossed for tomorrow then"
Really? This could be listed as a form of torture. But, part of us also knew that it'd be pushed back to be on Thursday...because, like I said...sometimes life gets crazy and that really, really seems to be the norm around here.
We went to Target and Russell picked out a little shirt for J.
So Thursday morning rolls around and we have no idea when the meeting for today is supposed to be. We cautiously hope its in the morning, but aren't expecting anything. The day before, we had learned that there were at least 4 families involved in the selection process...which is a ton. Part of us felt like we should feel nervous, but through this whole process, we just knew.
Roxie called a little after 10:00. I stared at my phone for a second, took a deep breath and answered:
"Oh my goodness, I'm so glad you led with that! I don't want to say we knew, but we knew!"
She told us that there was another family in the running who actually knew some of J's relations that he was still close to and she thought we were out for sure. But she really brought it home and the fact that we volunteer with kids at the crisis center along with our blip as 'safety monitors', swayed J's case worker in our favor.
Monday night we left 40 minutes early to get to the meeting and arrived 10 minutes late. I've never felt so anxious in traffic in my entire life.
We finally get to the meeting and, luckily, J's caseworker started with pictures.
I always get teary eyed when I think about big moments in my life. When Russell and I were preparing to get married, when meeting new nieces and nephews, seeing a picture of my 3 1/2 year old son for the first time...
But it never goes like that. I go into this surreal, try to listen, floaty mode. Where I just say, "ok" to all the things I thought I would cry and give emphatic yes!-es and of course!s.
At the close of the meeting we set a time for this friday (11/14/14) to meet J. Russell and I walked out to the parking lot where he kept hugging me and saying
"I'm so excited!"
I can't believe we're meeting our son on Friday. We aren't sure if he'll have been told that he is being adopted or if we'll just be introduced as foster mom's friends...who will just keep showing up...
We bought a kite, just in case there is a breeze.